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Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit's biography 1
disclaimer warning! this is really insane. read with extreme caution. this is a''' joke fanfiction''' from me staying up too late this is 'not '''inspired by/based on/etc. sparkleFur or Starkit's Prophecy don't take this seriously if you have a problem with this just tell me serious writing is here Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit's biography:book 1:the prophecy............................ prolouge and chapters 1-5 by: Tote Braaie aka stoatbramble aka stoatpaw aka stoat the science prophecies by: SWollowdadmingoosetsar aka willowlight7 aka willowlight aka wollow clicky click clickbait for the science prophecies............................... if you want to join comment or summon me on live chat by pomegranate or jguutj when i'm on prolouge: the existence of an organism known as Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit once upon a time there was a kit named Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit and her name was Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit she was also known as Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit insert twenty different ways of me saying "her name was Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit" here and so one day there was a hurtling asterioid about to kill us and Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit existed and then the asterioid went away and killed the dinosaurs instead wooohooo chapter one: everyone asks the main character about science once upon a time Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit existed again but the dinosaurs were dead this time so she whispered "science is the solution to all of mankind's problems science is knowledge science is power science is everything.........................................." and then everyone asked "what is science Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit???????//" Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit repeated what she said before but louder and everyone knew what science was but there was more and then there was chapter two chapter two: Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit becomes Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw wow Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit existed again but six moons had passed and the leader, Prophecystar, held Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit's apprentice ceremony "Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit, you are now six moons, and from this day on, you will be known as Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw. Calderaspirit, you will be her mentor." Prophecystar announced. Calderaspirit began to exist. "Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw, Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw!" the clan cheered Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw and Calderaspirit touched noses because they were mentor and apprentice now yay woohoo party time Calderaspirit led Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw out of camp "We must tour the territory because idk" Calderaspirit meowed. Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw nodded, and so the two toured the crash site of the hurtling asteroid about to kill us, of which the skeletons of the dinosaurs lay beneath. "the dead will be all..................." Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw meowed. "The dinosaurs are dead." Calderaspirit replied, holding up a copy of ''All My Friends Are Dead, which is an actual book. "but science" Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw retorted "is EVERYTHING" Calderaspirit backed away from the angry apprentice. "Fine, let's go back to camp." So they walked into camp. chapter three: 56787654323456789876543234567890987654321234567890987654321234567890 seasons "OOF I FORGOT ABOUT THIS" I screamed while Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw existed as usual. "ALSO OLDME WAS VERY CRINGY EWWWWWW" 56787654323456789876543234567890987654321234567890987654321234567890 seasons passed when i forgot about this and everyone but Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw died because she's immortal so then Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw became Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusstar the overlord of everythingness and gained OVERPOWERED POWERS and she turned the present into 56787654323456789876543234567890987654321234567890987654321234567890 seasons ago back when she was still Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw because this is a low-quality joke fanfiction, and because Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw is totally not a mary sue, she kept her OVERPOWERED POWERS. When this happened, Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw from 56787654323456789876543234567890987654321234567890987654321234567890 seasons in the future vanished in a puff of glitter-colored glitter because glitter. Her OVERPOWERED POWERS transferred to the original Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw. and so Chapter 4 began. chapter 4: that one cliche battle scene as Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw (now with OVERPOWERED POWERS) was existing, she realized her clone existed, ScienceClan decided to promote her to warrior because Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw was apparently able to alter spacetime and other sciency stuff so, prophecystar held Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluspaw's warrior ceremony. "HI INSERT WARRIOR CEREMONY WORDS HERE HURTLINGASTEROIDABOUTTOKILLUSPAW IS NOW HURTLINGASTEROIDABOUTTOKILLUSOOF" prophecystar declared "Can I be the overlord of everythingness again?" Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof asked. "ok" everyone said. Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof used her OVERPOWERED POWERS to regain that title and then CLICHEEVILCLANNAMECLAN ATTACKED SCIENCECLAN :OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Meanstar ordered ClicheevilclannameClan to attack ScienceClan but Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof used her OVERPOWERED POWERS to make the ClicheevilclannameClan cats to realize their mistake and suddenly they became good and joined ScienceClan!!!! but meanstar's mean������������������ powers made it so he wasn't affected by Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof's OVERPOWERED POWERS how sad but suddenly the juan de fuca plate caused an earthquake because Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof used her OVERPOWERED POWERS and meanstar died as he said "oof" and then the battle ended chapter 5: hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof and loveydovey aka cliche romance scene BOOM HURTLINGASTEROIDABOUTTOKILLUSOOF EXISTED AGAIN and Loveydovey did too Loveydovey was so pretty Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof immediately fell in love but so did Isocoles Scalene Equilateral who had a three part ancients name and everyone called her Triangle “i love you” Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof told Loveydovey “i love you too” Loveydovey said Triangle found her friends Circumference, Radius, Pi, Angle, and Mathpun and they sang “WE LOVE YOU LOVEYDOVEY, OH YES WE DOOOOOO” but then suddenly they realized this was all a cliche love triangle plot and fled the universe and so Doveyoof became canon chapter 6: the death of prophecystar Suddenly prophecystar collapsed as Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof existed "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" shrieked snailthroat the deputy with an unfortunate name as she collapsed too "*evil snickering*" snickered candybar the evil medicine cat ":OOOOOOOO candybar did u kill prophecystar and snailthroat!!!!!!" someone shouted "no" candybar said snailthroat died "Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof is new deputy" prophecystar said as he died "also candybar sent a fowlshaming ghost after me and i died" his ghost said "same here" snailthroat's ghost said and they sent a goose ghost at candybar who then died and so medicinepaw became medicinecat "tO THE GOOSE PIZZA" the two yelled as they quantumphysicsteleported there chapter 7 (and the final one): the goose pi(a)zza the Goose Piazza is a plaza/piazza with a goose statue but everyone calls it the Goose Pizza it has a special connection with StarGooseClan so that's where Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof and Medicinecat went as Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof existed they went and Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusoof stood by it. insert leader ceremony scene here and thus she was crowned Hurtlingasteroidabouttokillusstar the overlord of everything they quantumphysicsteleported back to ScienceClan camp where everyone cheered for their new leader *closes book cover* well that was an interesting story. *sets down book, picks up other one* be sure to read Hurtlingasteroidabouttokilluskit's biography:book 2: the juan de fuca plate soon! *credits roll* Category:Fanfiction Category:Completed Fanfiction